In a recent KOMO News Q&A, I had the chance to talk with John Colucci about something a lot of us have been feeling lately—anxiety, especially when it stems from not being able to control what's happening around us. Below is the video from that conversation, plus a short recap of the key ideas we explored.
Why Uncertainty Feeds Anxiety
It’s human nature to want control—especially when things feel chaotic. And during times like a global pandemic, or any major life upheaval, that sense of control can vanish fast. Unsurprisingly, this loss of control often spikes anxiety levels.
One of the first things I encourage clients to try, though it’s easier said than done, is to accept that *some* things really are out of our hands. Trying to force control where none exists just adds to our distress. This is where the Serenity Prayer can be a helpful guide:
“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
What This Looks Like in Real Life
In therapy, I’ve seen this show up in all kinds of ways. Some people exhaust themselves trying to change things they truly can’t—like another person’s behavior, or the timing of life transitions. Others feel stuck or overwhelmed by challenges they *could* actually take steps toward changing, like setting boundaries, tending to their own self-care, or speaking up in a relationship.
Learning to tell the difference—and to respond accordingly—isn’t about achieving perfection. It’s a practice. Over time, we can all get better at knowing when to lean in and take action, and when to let go and conserve our energy.
This is one of the skills we work on regularly in individual therapy, couples counseling, and even in our online sessions. Like any skill, it takes time—and support—to build.
Therapy isn’t about fixing everything—it’s about having a space to think clearly, feel heard, and get a little steadier in uncertain times. If that sounds like something you’re ready for, feel free to reach out. We offer telehealth sessions for individuals and couples across Washington.