Someone recently sent me this New York Times article by Tim Wu, and I’ve returned to it several times since. It touches something deep: the quiet pressure many of us feel to perform, to master, or to be “excellent” even in our downtime. And it’s slowly stealing our joy.
The article explores how hobbies have been co-opted by the pursuit of achievement. Instead of jogging for fun, we feel the need to train for a marathon. Instead of painting to unwind, we’re tempted to post it online and hope for likes. Instead of learning a language or an instrument just for the delight of it, we pressure ourselves to be fluent or impressive. Our leisure becomes another space where we’re not allowed to just be average—and happy about it.
Wu makes the case for mediocrity—not as failure, but as freedom. The freedom to do something just because it brings you joy. The freedom to try, to be imperfect, to enjoy the learning curve instead of chasing mastery. This is a radical idea in a culture obsessed with optimization. And yet, it might be one of the most restorative shifts you could make for your mental health.
At Clarity Counseling Seattle, we see how the pressure to achieve can show up everywhere, including in therapy. Clients often feel like they’re “failing” at self-growth, or like they need to prove they’re healing the “right” way. But healing—and living—aren’t performance arts. Sometimes, the most courageous act is choosing to enjoy something without being good at it.
If you’re struggling to connect with joy, meaning, or a sense of play, therapy can help you reclaim those things—not by fixing you, but by making room for the parts of you that don’t need fixing.
You might also enjoy these reflections:
- 30 Habits for Happiness? Maybe. But Let’s Start with a Few.
- Choosing to Heal: What It Really Means to Begin Again
- Imposture Syndrome: We All Experience It (But We Don’t Have To!)
You don’t have to be great to be grounded, joyful, or free. You just have to show up.